Pretty much every female on my Mother’s side of the family either has Sjogren’s Syndrome or some other related auto-immune problem and I’m showing some telltale signs of following suit. It’s something that kicks in a bit later in life and my Mom and Aunt are struggling. A few weeks ago my Aunt went to see a specialist who advised her (along with every other woman in our family) to give up Gluten, Dairy and Eggs as a part of treatment and prevention.

So let it be said that I basically LIVE for cheese. And bread. And a little bit eggs. So giving these things up? Totally not my favorite. And guess what — I found out by substituting Soy for basically everything that I’m allergic to Soy as well! Ok, so that’s Gluten, Dairy, Eggs, and Soy. Oh, and Cigarettes ‘cuz I quit smoking 4 months ago, too. My last remaining vice was my lifelong Diet Coke addiction, which I held on to for dear life — until this week. ‘Cuz apparently, if you give up all your major coping mechanisms at once in the middle of a time of great stress, your physiology goes totally berserk and you have mild anxiety attacks on double decker busses after jostling your way through hoards of not-so-jolly Xmas Market shoppers and having ONE — count ’em, ONE — caffeinated beverage. Le sigh.

So that’s caffeine, cigarettes, gluten, dairy, eggs, soy and, heck, let’s throw in ginger ‘cuz I’m already allergic to that. And at this point, I’m having to get reaaaaaal creative about finding foods that satisfy my working-class comfort food appetites — which brings us to the recipe below for a Gluten Free, Dairy free, Soy Free, and *EGG FREE* ‘Egg’ Salad Sandwich.

The other day my girl and I were having a salad with fresh raw mushrooms on top and we both noted that the mushrooms tasted a bit like boiled egg. A-Hah!

For one sandwich:

– 5 large white mushrooms
– 1 tablespoon vegan* mayonnaise (not heaping)
– yellow mustard to taste
– pinch salt & pepper

Optional:
– a few green onions
– bit of chopped red pepper

* – note, not all vegan mayo is soy-free, so if you can’t find soy-free vegannaise, there’s a recipe here to make your own.

Wash the mushrooms. Break out your food processor and chop them down to ‘egg salad’ proportions. You can obviously use a knife but it’s tedious. Mix in the mayo and mustard and any other optional ingredients you’d like and serve it on the gluten free bread of your choice with lettuce. If you’re not into GF breads, it’d work just as well wrapped in the lettuce leaves alone.

I’d post a picture, but I ate it too fast. I’ll add one in next time I make it.